Posts Tagged 'stress'

Let’s get it started

Well, that was no way to start the summer.

And as you can see from my new header, (unless you’re reading this from your feed reader) summer really has finally arrived around here. My mother-in-law left yesterday and by the time she left we made our peace. Or maybe I should say, I just finally let it go. Sadly, though, I spent the week in a lot of pain. I have trouble with neck pain from time to time and this was the most pain I’ve ever had. My own mom suggested that maybe now that my mother-in-law is gone that the pain would subside. As usual, she’s right. This morning I woke up feeling good enough to tell dh that I thought I would go for our weekly 5K run with him. It is really scary to me how stress can manifest itself in that way.

So after all the general yuckiness of last week, I’ve been doing some thinking about what I really want to savor about this short season.  I have one word for you: popsicles.  It’s at the top of my list.  I’m taking suggestions, too, what things do you love the most about summer?

Keeping it together

We survived the first week of school! Even though starting school was something I was really ready to do, and I think the dutchkid was ready too, it still felt stressful. I was indeed the oldest in my class, although there are many other non-traditional students in there as well. While looking at the syllabi is intimidating (final project: a written composition in 4 parts incorporating specific chord progressions) I have a good feeling that this will be both challenging and rewarding. I already knew that my lack of working knowledge in more advanced music theory (beyond just the basic key signatures and scales) is the missing link in my playing. My private lessons don’t begin until next week.

The dutchkid’s first day of school was today. When I left her this morning she didn’t shed a tear, although she did tell me in the car on the way home today that she wasn’t so sure she liked it. It is a much longer day than she’s used to. Her little school does a small nap/quiet time in the afternoon, and of course she was having none of that. She told me all about how they made her be quiet. I’m hoping she’ll adjust once we get into the routine.

It really feels like summer is on it’s way out… I’m going to do my best to enjoy what’s left of it this weekend!

PCS life lessons

Nothing like a good old PCS to raise the stress levels. We are in full move prep mode over here. I’m a big believer in not tearing your house apart a month before the move, it just interferes with my quality of life. But there’s also the realization that so much of the prep I’m running around doing could have been done weeks ago…if it weren’t for the fact that I was in denial about said move. So it’s a fine balance.

I have learned things in the past few days that by rights I should have known already… like the autocraft shop will recycle old motor oil and transmission fluid for you, or that there is a dry cleaner right down the street but they take 4 days to process anything. Yeah, that’s me. I want to dry clean things that have been waiting for months right now.

Today I encountered one of life’s PCS conundrums. We have one trash day left. In order to clear housing, my trash can has to be hosed out and clean. So after early next week I can’t put anything else in the trash can. And of course, because both dh and I were in denial and procrastinating to boot, we waited until now to seriously go through my basement. My trash can overfloweth. And the trash men are zealous about not picking up stuff that’s not in the can.

Adding to this is the fact that most of my neighbors are already gone, which means that my fridge has been the recipient of everybody’s condiments. I’m going to have a ton more stuff to throw away. Argh. And I’m feeling guilty because I won’t have time to recycle the empties. I’m going to be knocking on random strangers doors and asking to use their trash can.

You would think that by now (I think this is move 7? I’ve lost track) I would have it all figured out. Valuable time management lessons, courtesy of Uncle Sam.

So that’s why I married him.

Right now I am eating the best green curry to be had in this neck of the woods, better than either of the Thai restaurants in town.

The way that my dh has been relaxing lately is by cooking.  And let me tell you, he needs to de-stress.  He absolutely hates being in a school environment and it shows in every aspect of his attitude about life.  In short, he’s miserable to live with.  He’s trying to do a master’s program along with the Army school and every time he talks about it you can practically see his blood pressure rising.  Sometimes I think that he would have rather deployed than be here, and lately I’ve secretly been wondering if that wouldn’t have been easier on all involved.

Well, easier on everything except my tastebuds.  The man can cook. He has some serious culinary skills, which used to bother me a bit because I’m competitive, but I’m way past that now.  If only I could get him to clean to de-stress I would be set.

Impending doom

It’s here. That sense of “holy crap how am I going to get everything done before the movers get here?!”

We spent this weekend trying to see those last few people we would feel guilty about not seeing before we left, including my in-laws today. Feeling slightly guilty about being relieved that I’m moving farther away from my mother-in-law (well, not that guilty). Dh and I spent the car ride back going over mental lists of what we need to accomplish this week.

The dreams have started. For years, when under stress I have these odd packing dreams. Usually I’m running out of time trying to get to the airport, and things keep on preventing me from getting things into my suitcase. In a strange trick of the mind, now that I AM packing, I’m having similar dreams but they’re more about losing things. Last night I had a vivid dream about my dh’s camera equipment. Somehow I had misplaced his astronomically expensive Nikon D200 at what must have been a photographers’ conference. In the dream I kept on searching through endless camera bags.

So there you have it. A glimpse into my twisted psyche. I think I’m going to just let the movers have at it and throw the rest into the U-haul.

Drowning

I am so far behind in my “To Do” list I feel like I will never be caught up again. I wish I could say that this was unusual for me, but the honest truth is that since my dh came home in August I have felt like I have no time to do anything. When he was gone, as soon as the dutchkid went to sleep I had all that time in the evenings to myself to do whatever I wanted (and I am a night owl, too). So if I wanted to work on a project or sit on the computer until the wee hours I could.

Now, I have this husband around who thinks that I should spend time with him! (imagine that!). Plus a toddler who is not very good at entertaining herself… At the end of the day I’m exhausted, but haven’t really accomplished a thing. I feel pulled in a million different directions all the time. There is just not enough of me to go around, it seems. I don’t know how moms with many children do it! When we move I am definitely being more careful about what outside commitments I take on.

I’m hoping that the holiday disruption to our routine is part of the reason. This week finally feels like I’ll be getting back to normal again, mostly because dh is back to a regular work schedule. It’s nice when he’s home, but I need my groove back. Desperately.

Running to stand still

Well, we’ve survived the first official week of being home from vacation. It actually felt good to get back into our routines. I don’t think fall ever seemed so busy as it has over the past few years. It seems like even my piano students are stressed out about how busy their lives are. I don’t remember being that way when I was a kid, but it’s a different world since then.

I was feeling overwhelmed about about all the commitments I have going on in my life before we left. I think I must have just needed a break. It still feels like I stepped back into my life and hit the ground running, though. This fall seems more difficult than others because while I know a move is coming, we still aren’t sure exactly where. I can’t think of another time during my dh’s time in the Army when we’ve had to wait quite like this. Usually the Army pulls a fast one and we end up with orders long before we had anticipated moving. Not so this time.

We are still waiting to hear whether or not he got into the school. We have more than a month left to wait. In the meantime, those orders do read: Korea.


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The Small Is Beautiful Manifesto

Music stacked up on my piano at the moment

Partita 5 in G Major (Bach)

Dance in Bulgarian Rhythm No. 6 (Bartok)

Sonatine II movt de menuet (Ravel)

Nocturne in B-flat Major (Szymanowska)

Sonata Op. 24 "Spring" (Beethoven)

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The naughty angel

skating (Dec 8)

luminaria Dec 7

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