This morning I recertified in CPR. I let my card lapse because I forgot about it and I’m not actively employed in health care anyway. I heard the guidelines had really changed, so I thought I would redo it. In some of the parenting classes that I’m going to be teaching I will cover choking and CPR so I wanted to be up on the latest and greatest.
The class was offered at the local hospital and it was relatively cheap ($50) for the healthcare provider version. I wasn’t too worried about it, other than my normal performance anxiety. I got the book ahead of time and even read through it.
I was just a few minutes late (I know, shocker for those of you that know me, I’m late for everything) because I couldn’t find the classroom right away. When I walked in the teacher gave me this disapproving stare and said “You just made it”. That should have been my first sign. They hadn’t even started anything yet. She then informs us that most of the teaching will be done via video, and that at the end “You will have to run through a scenario and do it perfectly.” She holds up her stopwatch, “We have our stopwatches today so that we can make sure that you are doing compressions at exactly 100 per minute.”
Right about then I was having nightmarish flashbacks to nursing school. Professors failing people because they didn’t think you were nurse “material”, skills tests where you would have to do things over and over in front of other students until it was “perfect”. Blech. I was reminded of that awful feeling of being measured up and being found wanting. I was asking myself why it was that I actually paid for this privilege. Two other instructors were helping to evaluate the students, whom do you think I got?
I am proud to say that I only had to do the final check off one time and I got 100% on my written test. Take THAT you CPR nazi.






