Turkey for me, turkey for you

I hope you had a wonderful thanksgiving. I am a little bit sad that I didn’t get to finish NaBloPoMo in style. We spent it as we did last year, with my dh’s grandparents and extended family in Florida. My dh’s aunt did have internet, but for some reason whenever I tried to open up wordpress and write, the browser shut down. I took it as a sign that I should be focusing on other things, and it was good to take a break.

It was such a pleasant change from last year, where I really felt like it was open season on my parenting. This year we didn’t stay in a hotel as I thought we would, but only because someone else did, freeing up a room for us to have instead of the floor. That alone made a huge difference in my comfort, but I think it’s also because the dutchkid is older and I have another year of parenting under my belt. Sadly, even though my parenting wasn’t under the microscope this time, I think my mother-in-law and dh’s aunt just switched their focus to someone else. One of my sisters-in-law fielded some pretty rude comments.

We enjoyed catching up with everyone, ate entirely too much delicious food and dh and I got to go see a movie (hello, Mr. Bond). It was fun to watch the dutchkid get to know her great grandparents a little bit. My dh’s granddad has Alzheimer’s, so we feel very much like every visit is precious. Even though Granddad has absolutely no idea any longer who we are or who the dutchkid is, he just lights up when little children are around. That was probably the hardest part of the trip, it’s difficult to realize how much of Granddad’s memory is gone. My dh was looking through photo albums with him, and often he no longer recognizes himself.

Throughout our time there I kept wondering what it was like for him, to be celebrating with all these people who obviously knew him, but he didn’t have a clue who we were. Even though he did seem surprised by us at times, he was always pleasant and always happy to play games with the great grandchildren running around. I try to console myself with the thought that he felt loved, even if it was love from a roomful of strangers.

Ack!

Frantically trying to pack for our voyage today, but wanted to blog before I forgot. I don’t know that I will have internet access while at dh’s grandparents, so my NaBloPoMo streak might be over. But I’ll write if I can, otherwise see you on the other side!

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Family

“This is my mom, this is my dad and this is me. This is my family!”

Sometimes it is the simplest things that blow me away. Drawing people is a new thing for her, and I’ve never heard those words from her before.

We’re finally on the mend over here, which is good. Just in time for our Thanksgiving travels. I’m rather sorry about my ugly post yesterday, but sadly it was an ugly day all the way around. I’m looking forward to focusing on being thankful this week.

Who can it be now?

Who can it be knocking at my door?
Go ‘way, don’t come ’round here no more.
Can’t you see that it’s late at night?
I’m very tired, and I’m not feeling right.
All I wish is to be alone;
Stay away, don’t you invade my home.
Best off if you hang outside,
Don’t come in – I’ll only run and hide.

I love Men at Work. I just wish I weren’t living this song lately. I know that I should be culturally sensitive about the international students here, but my American-ness is getting the best of me. I am having trouble with the children of the international family that we sponsor (aged 12 and 18). They show up at my door unannounced, often when my dh isn’t home, they don’t speak anything besides broken English, and when I let them in they stay for HOURS unless I force them to leave. I am not exaggerating. My neighbors have noticed, and so often they will call me to invent an emergency when they notice that the kids are at my house. It has been the one nice thing about living in the fishbowl.

It is a Latin American cultural thing, but part of the problem lies in the older of the two children, he’s obviously developmentally delayed, which makes matters worse because he doesn’t seem to “get it”. Often he will show up by himself. And he is sort of creepy.

I have stopped answering my door. And then today? After they rang my doorbell with no answer, they went to my back fence and got my dogs excited. Then they came onto my screened porch to knock on my main door. Unfortunately my dh didn’t lock it when he left this morning. When I didn’t answer, they tried the door and came in.

I like to think of myself as a kind, considerate person. But I am done. DONE. I was borderline rude the last time they came, I actually made them leave in the rain. But this time I wasn’t only inconvenienced, I was pissed. By the time I came down the stairs they had gone back onto my porch, so I just opened the door to try to get my point across: “You can’t come in. I am sick, my baby is sick, not today” The older one just asked repeatedly in accented English, “how are you?” I finally just said “My baby is sick.” and shut the door. And locked it.

I called my dh and told him that he had better reinforce the message in Spanish to their father that they are not to enter my house again without being invited. Which unless my dh is at home, will be never. I am done being culturally sensitive. Welcome to America.

Well, isn’t this fun.

We’re sick over here today. The dutchkid has been fighting off a cold for the past few days and last night was coughing so much that I had to wake her up to give her medicine. At around 6am she woke up again and was feverish, 102.3 to be exact. Poor kid. She has perked up but has been lying around all day. She’s not truly sick very often, so it always makes me nervous.

And just to make life interesting, I got up this morning and suddenly had hives. I do get them from time to time, I haven’t figured out exactly what triggers them for me. The trouble is, normally Benadryl is all I need, and today it hasn’t made a dent. I’m hoping I don’t end up having to go the ER and wait with my sick child in tow (dh is in class today). Wouldn’t that be an adventure.

Hopefully we will be better by tomorrow. I hope you had a nicer weekend than mine turned out to be!

Cue the “Chariots of Fire” music

Just hum it to yourself, it will make this post so much more inspiring.

This morning I ran in my first race since the Army Ten Miler last year. It was just a 5K, and I had the privilege of running with a friend here who is a new runner. This was his very first road race, and he was going to do it all by himself and at the spur of the moment I told him I would go with him. I’ve run with a few other people who were first timers and it’s fun to cheer them on. Besides, I am of the opinion that no one should run their first race alone, it’s so much easier to keep going when you have someone with you.

I was wondering what on earth I was thinking when my toes were numb at the starting line, but it was a beautiful route, along the river here. Times like those I wish we had one of those tiny point and shoot cameras to stash in my pocket. I think that is when I enjoy racing the most — when I’m shape enough that I can just cruise along, it’s a pretty day and I’m focusing on someone else finishing well, not me.

My friend did great and I think he’s hooked, he’s already talking about the next one.

Homebodiness

I used to feel guilty about the fact that I am often drained by a lot of social interactions. My dh, who is very extroverted, often thinks it’s strange that I will turn down playdates or other social opportunities. When I have had a busy week (or know that busy-ness is up ahead) I crave solitude. You would think that as a SAHM I would have more “alone” than I could stand, but it just doesn’t work that way for me. Besides, SAHMing can be busy too. I recently took the Meyer-Briggs personality test, and it provides ranges of points according to how you answered the questions. On the extroverted section? My score was a complete zero. Somehow that made me feel better, and now I don’t feel so guilty if I’m not in the mood to go outside to hang out with my ever-present neighbors, or turn down a playdate. I don’t always say no, I try to be considerate of the dutchkid, who just might be an extrovert like her daddy, but it has freed me to be more choosy when I need to be.

On Friday mornings, some very nice moms from my church get together at a playground in town. Sometimes we go, sometimes we don’t. I can’t tell you how nice it was to just stay home today. We had a leisurely breakfast and then headed out to our little park right across the street. Since it was morning, all the big kids and many of the little ones are in school of some kind, so we had the place to ourselves. I got to sit with the camera and be the keeper of the mittens, while she dug in the sand to her heart’s content.

I feel recharged enough to look forward to my busy weekend.

It seemed like such a good idea.

I’m sort of anti “diaper” bag. I did carry one when the dutchkid was an infant, but it was only for a brief time. After that I transitioned to a big purse, and I carry my wallet and cell phone in a small felted purse that a friend made for me (that way I can leave the bag with the dutchkid when I need to). Anyhow, I’ve been sick of the one I’ve had for awhile and the good idea fairy struck and I thought, “Oh, I’ll make one really quick!” I looked at patterns but I thought it couldn’t be that hard so why should I spend the extra money when I could figure it out? Ha. Famous last words. Between getting the strap the right length, the bag big enough and trying to sew the lining and the outside of the bag together in some logical fashion…

This was going to be my prototype because I happened to have that fabric lying around, but I’m going to use it just because it cost me some blood, sweat and choice language. Let’s just say next time I’m getting a pattern.

But now that I’ve burned myself out on bag making, I finally got around to getting my Oliver + S bedtime story pajamas pattern cut and ready to go. The dutchkid is in serious need of some cute new jammies.

Blah Blah Blah

*warning* This is really one of those days where if I was not doing NaBloPoMo I would just keep my thoughts to myself.

We had an uneventful day today, the dutchkid and I. We took a “big run” as she calls it, this morning and it was so cold I had to find her hat and mittens as well as a blanket. Went to our favorite library and played outside in the chilly weather. I did make the mistake of inviting in a neighbor whose children the dutchkid loves to play with, and got an earful of neighborhood scuttlebutt. It’s strange to me how often I find myself on the receiving end of information I was not interested in being in possession of. I must have “I’m too polite to tell you to shut up” written on my forehead.

Mostly though, today my thoughts have been about the bailout of Detroit’s Big 3 automakers and the future of the economy in Michigan. I know, lofty thoughts for this SAHM. But really that’s a fancy way to say that I’m worried about my dad and everyone else that I know and love who will be affected should things fall even further apart. I read some interesting stuff last night by one of my favorite bloggers and a Detroiter, Sweet Juniper. Even if you’re not interested in his deep thoughts, you should really go look through his astonishing photos of urban decay in Detroit. Fantastic.

eta: You can get there through his main site, but I should have made it a bit easier, here are his Flickr collections on Detroit and more recent photos with more of descriptions are on his photo site

Grownup

The weather here has turned much colder and wetter, and you can really tell that winter (well, I use that term lightly here in the South) is on its way. I’m glad about that because for heaven’s sake Thanksgiving is next week and then of course December won’t be far behind. I consistently feel like time is leaving me in the dust, one of the side effects of being a grownup, I guess. It’s worse for me when the seasons don’t mesh with the dates on the calendar. Growing up in the North there’s just more definition between them, here I feel sort of adrift.

I just had another birthday recently, and the older I get the more I seem interested in dragging my feet as far as the passage of time. Especially after the dutchkid was born, I have felt this pull towards trying to slow life down or somehow mark it at least. It all goes by so fast, and that’s accentuated when you have a small person growing at warp speed. The good part is that as she gets older I seem to spend more time doing the things that make each season special. This summer we spent countless hours swimming, something I haven’t done in years. This fall has been about preschool and leaves finally changing. I find myself really looking forward to Christmas again. I guess for me, it’s a chance to relive my own childhood in a very satisfying way. I suppose being a grownup does have some perks.