The escapades of a military wife
I can’t go to SpouseBUZZ Live 3 this weekend, even though it’s not all that far from me. Boo. I’m going to have to settle for trying to watch it on SyncLive.
It’s probably for the best, otherwise I would have to blow my cover and everyone would know that I’m actually a big, hairy truck driving man.
This morning I decided to attend a FRG planning meeting for the unit Christmas party. I managed to get through it without ending up in charge of anything huge, which is nothing short of a miracle. My dh hates it when I volunteer for stuff like this because I invariably end up complaining about the stress it adds to my life (and my to-do list). However, I am not one of those people who can sit through the meeting and let 2 people shoulder the majority of the work. I remember being required to make things happen when my dh was in command, and it was not a fun place to be in. Voluntold is the term that comes to mind. So I try to do my part.
This year I am making a turkey, which sounds impressive but really isn’t that hard, and also I’m lending my Christmas lights and helping decorate. Easy peasy. I’m not doing lights on my house this year, I decided to go for that quiet peaceful look with candles in the windows. Maybe it will lend me some of the peace that always seems to be missing from my holiday season.
For reasons that I am forbidden by my dh from saying, it is in my best interest to learn to speak better Spanish by the time we move. He got me the Rosetta Stone program so that I could work on it because even though the name of this blog comes from the fact that I am of Dutch and Mexican descent (a Dutchican) I speak awful, broken Spanish. I got started on the program last night and it seems pretty good.
I took 2 semesters of college Spanish. After getting through the first lesson last night I realized I could’ve saved that time and money and just got Rosetta Stone.
The place where we are moving is my favorite Army post, not in terms of the surrounding community, but just in how the post is itself. It’s old, historic and majestic in this sort of run down way. We haven’t lived at that many different posts (5) so maybe my experience is just too limited.
It’s not a favorite of anyone else I know, including my dh. He hates it as a matter of fact. He stops just short of declaring it to be the root of all evil, instead settling on “the place where bad things happen”. Which isn’t exactly true, the bad things tend to happen after we leave there, so I feel that you can hardly judge the place by that standard. Besides, he was the one who applied to go to the school there, I had nothing to do with that. Might as well make the best of it. He counters that with, “I did it because I know how much you love it there and that it’s your Army wife dream to live in one of those houses,” as he rolls his eyes. Ah, that’s love for you.
I deny it, without fail….I am certainly not that shallow! I love it because of the good friends we met while there, the memories I have. There is no way that is true about how I love it only for the housing I can live in. Most military folks would say that while living on post has its benefits, the housing itself is not usually one of them. In fact, this place was the first and only time we have ever lived in government quarters.
We lived in this cockroach infested, over 50 years old, crowded housing, but beyond all reason I loved it. I loved the wood floors (covered in at least 2 inches of protective polyurethane). I loved the windows (that I spent hours scraping because they were so speckled from years of painting and repainting). My house had good house “karma” for lack of a better term. I can’t explain why I love it, I just do! I love driving around post and seeing the plaques that denote houses of the Army’s famous generals. I love the big trees. I love that the CG’s house is an grand old plantation house. It probably just goes with my penchant for historic churches, I love it just because it’s old.
It’s changed since we left there. The housing is privatized, which I’ve heard mixed things about. Some of the housing, maybe even the row house we lived in before, might be gone. According to their website the company demolished some units, but has renovated nearly all of the historic ones. Dh is convinced we will be living in a “ghetto” house again because we’ll only be there a year. Heh. We qualify for field grade housing since he got promoted (for the record, the only time I’ve been glad to pull the officer’s wife card). I already emailed the housing lady, 6 months in advance. I am already thinking about what kind of Christmas decorations I should buy for the theoretical house at the after Christmas sales. Plotting how to get my gigantic fern that I haven’t managed to kill yet, transported there so it will to look good on my porch. Excited about the housing? Who, me?
So I’m reading this book, Young at Art and in the spirit of giving my child some new art “experiences” I decided to buy some washable non-toxic poster paint at the giant Wal-mart yesterday. Washable, well, that’s a matter of opinion. She has a definite pink hue today.
When I showed the picture to dh he did a double take, “She looks like she’s bleeding!” Oops. My choices of color were red, yellow or white. The book said to choose a high contrast color!
Disclaimer: No toddlers were harmed writing of this post.
I get along reasonably well with my in-laws. I even like my mother-in-law for the most part. Our relationship before I had the dutchkid was wonderful, afterwards… well, let’s just say we have very different parenting philosophies. While we were in Florida, we stayed with dh’s aunt, along with his mom and a bunch of other relatives. We were all in very cramped quarters. Several of my nieces and a nephew were there, all young children. We were the ones unlucky enough to arrive last and as such, we did not have our own room. We got to sleep on inflatable mattresses in the living room. Nothing like having a strong-willed toddler out of her routine, combined with not being able to close the door to put your parenting skills on display.
As it turns out I parent very differently from everyone. I’m sure my own insecurities had a lot to do with my feelings, but I spent the entire time just feeling very judged on everything from what I feed her to how she goes to sleep. I received several not so subtle hints about how I should do lots of things, ranging from “let her cry herself to sleep”, to spanking her, to taking away her pacifier. I’m sure they were scandalized to know that at almost age 2 she still breastfeeds on occasion.
I don’t ascribe to any one parenting method, but I definitely tend more towards Dr. Sears than Dr. Ezzo. I am comfortable with how and why I handle things, but it gets tiresome being on the defensive all the time. I am proud to say I have mastered the smile and nod while doing what I think is the best. But it still rankles to hear people praise my sisters-in-law and their children while I get the “you really should…”
It would be nice if when you became a parent you automatically grew the thick skin required, or maybe the hospital should just issue earplugs. And next time? I’m staying in a hotel.
Dvd player for car… check
Potty seat….check
Clothes…..check
Kennel reservation for dogs…..check
Extra patience for being cooped up with my in-laws in close quarters…. as checked as we’re going to get
Wishing you a very happy Thanksgiving……check!
May you enjoy your meal and the tryptophan induced nap afterwards!
My dh made it into the school!
We will remain here until early next summer and then PCS, no trying to get moved over the holidays. We don’t have to worry about command sponsorship, we will have time to sell our house, we won’t have to worry about our dogs. I won’t have to massage my dh’s injured ego. A huge sigh of relief.
I am slightly disappointed we won’t be going to Korea (as I knew I would be). We will be returning to a post we have lived at previously, here in the South. I have good memories of there, but it will be decidedly less exciting than moving across the world. I am going to have to invent some adventures so that I don’t bore ya’ll to tears.
It feels so good to just know.
Let the planning begin!
My dh is well intentioned. Really he is. Except when he invites the pastor of our church over for Sunday dinner on a whim. He says to me on the way to the car after church today, “I think we should invite the pastor over for lunch!” My immediate response isn’t printable because my mom reads my blog, and I was standing in the church parking lot so I couldn’t say it out loud.
I didn’t have a meal planned.
My house wasn’t clean.
The dutchkid was in dire need of a nap.
If looks could kill I would be a widow. But instead of taking the hint, dh runs back into the church to ask the pastor. Thankfully I had driven separately, because I have to be there early to practice with the praise team. So I race home to frantically throw junk into closets so that my house won’t look like like it usually does, (ie, like tornado alley) while trying to think of what food I could make.
Luckily, the pastor is a very laid back guy and I like him a great deal. He even helped me cook a little bit, the man can make a mean biscuit! It all ended well, which is good for dh. While rushing around like a chicken-with-my-head-cut-off I was also thinking of various ways I could cause him great pain and suffering. He has much to be thankful for this Thursday.
Normally, I’m not that into birthdays. I think it’s because my brother (who is 3 years younger than I am) shares my birthday. So as a kid, it was never just my special day. Now that I’m celebrating the anniversary of my 29th birthday several times over, it’s not something I publicize (except today, on my blog, ha). When your baby sister calls you and has to ask how old you are followed by, “you are old,“ it sort of loses its luster.
But I got some good stuff this year! I got to eat a nice dinner alone with my dh the night before, Godiva chocolates, a dvd (Ratatouille, which I haven’t seen yet, this was a dual present for the dutchkid and I), several magazine subscriptions, a gift certificate to my favorite tea catalog (thanks mom!), not to mention the laptop I am typing on that I’ve been enjoying for months now. It was a good day. Even though I had to go to the commissary on payday, on the weekend before the holiday, with my child in tow. It was my birthday, I was invincible!
